What Day Is It, Anyway?

Things I Have Learned During a Pandemic When You Have To Stay Home

1. You should always stock your pantry as though you’re preparing to hunker down for a hurricane. A box of Thin Mints, a bag of stale cereal, and a dozen cans of pet food are not enough to live on.
2. You also need wine.   And beer.   And limes for the gin and tonic.
3. When your fridge and freezer is full to the brim, the stuff in the fridge and freezer lasts longer.   Except peas and tater tots, because my daughter eats them EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
4. That ginormous bag of rice may have been the best thing I bought at the Asian market.  The rice steamer may just have been the best wedding present we ever received.
5. I can rustle up a tasty dish with any leftovers.  Who knew Brussels sprouts go with pretty much everything?   Three days of leftover chicken stew and dumplings, however, is more than enough.
6. I miss going out for dinner – but my bank account is happy.   I like spending less money on Whataburger/Pei Wei/Sushi Pop/Ciro’s/insert any of my daughter’s favorite restaurants here.
7. I do, however, miss Escalantes Tex-Mex more than all the others.   Pay days might just have to be Margaritaville and Taco Tuesday in our house, even if it’s not Tuesday.
8. After months of wanting to deep clean my house and organize my closets, but lacking the time because of work commitments or my daughter’s sports schedule, I discovered that lack of time is not the reason why I avoid these things.
9. I love working from home again.   I did it for six years in my previous career, and you can’t beat the short commute or being able to stay in your favorite T and sweats or shorts ALL DAY.   Note to Self: Must set alarms to brush teeth/shower/clean cat box, etc., and don’t forget that Mondays/Thursdays are trash days.
10. My senior dog loves me working from home.   I don’t know how much time we have left with him, as he’s now 12 and stiff in his hind legs, but I am grateful for these days of 24/7 companionship.
11. The cat, however, doesn’t give a shit that I’m home all day, and spends most of his time trying to ignore me – unless of course, I am trying to work – at which time he decides he absolutely must sit on my lap/my hands/any books or plans I am working on, while kneading me to death .
12. There will be Good Days, Bad Days, and Ugly Cry Days.   I was given 30 minutes on Tuesday to grab what I could in my classroom  – it felt like the Amazing Teacher Race, where I was desperate to pass through the Roadblock, find the elusive Fast Forward, and skip straight to the Pit Stop.   I have learned that it’s okay to grieve the loss of your classroom, to miss your students, and be mad at the virus for taking all that away.
13. We teachers have always known what is most important in a classroom, and it’s definitely not a high-stakes, pressure-driven test.
14. The Arts are necessary to our survival and should never be removed from our schools or our neighborhoods.  I had forgotten how easy to lose oneself in books, music, theatre, film, and a well-written television script.   We have access to so many online libraries, museums, and theatres now.  And yes, Netflix, I am still watching.
15. Humans need physical contact to survive.   I miss those hugs and high fives that I always took for granted, and seeing my family, friends, and knee-high-to-a-grasshopper students face-to-face.
16. My mother is an amazing woman.  She survived the 1960s flu pandemic and single unmarried mom stigma; three bouts of severe clinical depression and psychosis in her fifties, sixties, and early seventies; and two years ago, six chemo treatments and three weeks of radiotherapy for an aggressive non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma at the age of 78.  I am so very grateful that she is settled and happy in her new flat, being cared for by the National Health Service without fear that medical bills will drain her pension funds.   I cannot even begin to express my admiration for the doctors, nurses, orderlies, and hospital staff who are striving to keep themselves safe and well even as they stare down this virus face-to-face.
17. My daughter is growing into a poised young woman.   She is an extroverted introvert who is kind to her friends and hilariously funny.   She’s also obsessed with Disney Plus, Grey’s Anatomy, and TikTok, and social media people I’ve never heard of.  Except for the Kardashians.  I’ve heard of them.
18. Sunday morning church online may be the best invention ever.   Don’t get me wrong, I’m lucky to belong to a church that makes me want to go there on Sundays, but it sure is nice to enjoy it live with coffee in my living room.
19. Laughter is always the best medicine.  The memes, video rants, and song parodies, have kept me smiling even as the news from the Covid-19 trenches worsens.
20. We need good reporters and unbiased media.   I have come to rely on my daily dose of GMA, Governor Cuomo briefings, and David Muir at 5.30pm, to keep me informed on what’s going on outside my little bubble.
21. That mute button is included on the remote for a reason, e.g. any time Trump is doing his free rallies WH press briefings.   And yes, I went there.
22. I should have bought shares in Zoom when nobody knew what it was.
23. Traveling is in my blood.   When we are on the other side of this, I’m taking my daughter to all those places I’ve always wanted to go and see but kept telling myself I never had the money, or the time: India, Peru, Alaska, Iceland, Singapore.  And back to the places I love.  Of course, Paris.  And Italy.  My heart breaks for Italy.
24. Nobody knows what day it is.   It’s like the Christmas holidays, but with no obvious date as a frame of reference, and a continual belly-full-of-cheese blur.
25. There are many people who never wash their hands, even after going to the bathroom.   Apparently,  these are the same people panic-buying all the toilet paper.
26. Despite the selfishness of the toilet paper hoarders, there are some amazing stories of humanity and selflessness in the face of adversity.   Neighbors helping neighbors, strangers waving at elderly nursing home residents with sweet messages on placards held up in the parking lot.
27. People working on farms and in grocery stores, those stocking warehouse shelves, or delivering supplies to quarantined or home-bound families – these hard workers are the bedrock of the American dream and need to be appreciated instead of being taken for granted by those who continue to deny their value in society.
28. Superheroes don’t wear capes.  They wear scrubs; they are the first responders; they are the firefighters, the medics, and the police officers who cannot stay home.
29. Climate change is real.  The Earth is grateful when we humans stop being selfish with her natural resources.  The skies are blue in the City of Angels;  dolphins and swans enjoy the canals of Venice that are empty of stirred-up sediment and water traffic.
30. Self-care is not only necessary for survival, it is essential.   

 I’ve been thinking for some time that this pandemic is a great reset into how we humans should be living our lives as world citizens: giving more, taking less, practising that attitude of gratitude not just when we have everything, but because we have so much more than we need to survive: and more often than not, we take that for granted.

On Saturday, after feeling overwhelmed for several days by the district’s new virtual teaching  requirements,  while also noting that my kitchen and living room looked like my classroom threw up in it, I decided to take a break, and disconnected from work, TV news, and chores.   I went for a leisurely walk in the ‘057:  just me and the sound of the birds and my footsteps, and an occasional wave to a neighbor in passing.  Others were doing the same – dads with coffee in hand, supervising their children on skateboards, bikes, and on foot; people walking their dogs;  others getting in their steps by walking, jogging, or running.

Windows occasionally revealed a bear, placed deliberately for any families participating in our recent neighborhood bear hunt.    A garden gate decorated with a lovely cross made of twigs, colorful eggs interlaced: a reminder that Easter is only two weeks away. Paper hearts on trees; chalk hearts scribbled on the pavement. I spotted three white birds in the ditch – their glossy white plumage stark against the muddy rainwater. There they were, spearing bugs and small frogs as they strutted along like fashion models on a catwalk.

I returned home to a late lunch of leftover pasta which I tossed in a quick homemade carbonara sauce a la Nigella Lawson; then connected with a friend of 44 years to dissect a poem I’d written recently for an anthology he’s editing.   More literary indulgence followed with a group face time chat and a book club discussion of an old favourite.   A walk with the dog, check in with my teen upstairs, dinner (more rice, peas, and tater tots), and the Tudors on Netflix completed my day.

What are you planning for your self-care this week?

A few scenes from my Self-Care Saturday: March 28th, 2020.

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